Well, a year and a half in and the hits just keep on coming. It turns out my theory that I'm allergic to our house based on my bout of hives for a month that popped up 5 days after moving, followed by a progression of pains that became chronic and then funky nerve things happening and all sorts of allergy issues and difficulty breathing, more so than normal.... is probably true. The various water issues we continue to encounter seem never ending and many of my symptoms indicate something having to do with inflammation from allergies or toxins, like oh say, MOLD.
We've been fairly lucky with our constant calls to the home warranty people and the various leaks and breaks being covered... until now. The water in the garage that we've been trying to determine the source of is a footer drain issue, which is outside the foundation. Thus, no one will cover it. The 1st quote we got sent me straight to the coffee shop to drown my sorrows over an iced vanilla latte and oatmeal cherry white chocolate chip cookie. Sounds incredible, huh? It is, or I should say was, as I gobbled that right up. And here you were just reading about all the water issues and thinking, glad I'm not her!
Anyway, all I can think is, at the rate I'm currently working, I'd have to teach yoga for an entire year to pay for this. I can't just go and spend the money I'm making frivolously on things to make this old house somewhere I want to enter each day, or on coffee or cupcakes or yoga gear or whatever my heart desires. This is a big chunk of our savings to fix this issue at a house my husband thinks we won't be in for much more than another year. But it needs fixed. I can't live in pain and keep spending all this money on chiropractors and massages and doctors to treat my symptoms which will just keep coming back as long as the reason for the problem surrounds me day and night!
As you can see, I'm in a bit of a catch 22. Allergic to my house. Not planning to live here forever. A small fortune to remedy the water issue that SEEMS to be causing my recurring inflammation and thus pain... More of just a craptastic situation. I think my biggest concern is we fix it and alleviate the water problems but my pain remains.
I get very frustrated with myself when I stress over money things. Especially when spending the money could improve our health! But mainly because I know darn well that money is meaningless in the grand scheme of life. But man, I'm not going to lie, it sure as heck helps! Feeling comfortable and secure in the event of something unexpected like a major health issue or loss of a job is something many take for granted when they have it, while many others stress over not having that savings should something ever happen.
So, I try. I try desperately not to care what the bank account says or all the things around this old house I dream of fixing or updating. I have a roof over my head. I'm warm in the winter and cool in the summer. I have clean, running water and appliances that wash my clothes and keep my food from spoiling. That's so much more than what so many have and it's something countless people dream of. I feel like a greedy, selfish American when I start to feel this way.
What to do, what to do... as I search for my reframe or my positive as I think about this money pit of an old house we got ourselves into. Well, here goes.
One: I always loved the character of old homes. I can't stand those cookie cutter neighborhoods where every house looks the same. We were just unfortunate that the people who lived here before us didn't keep up with the maintenance an old home requires. And I was distraught over the loss of my Pap just a couple days before seeing the house so I missed a ton of things I probably should have seen. We also felt we were in a rush to find something as my husband was being relocated in just a couple months.
Lesson learned. Renting and waiting for the right home is perfectly okay!!
Two: We've come a long way! Especially in the past couple months. The yard looks pretty now rather than something I would cringe to look at. I no longer feel embarrassed when people come over. Yes, it was that bad. We pulled all the plants out after my allergy issues in case it was something planted around the house that caused it. Then, we did nothing. So, there were a couple things here and there and big mud holes.
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| 1/2 of the front. There's even a dwarf peach tree by the kitchen window over there!! |
We did a few updates to the kitchen and one bath and we finally have grown up bedroom furniture!! So exciting, I know. Seriously though, I have such difficulty sleeping and am convinced that the ambiance of your bedroom is really important in helping to facilitate a good nights sleep. I couldn't stand our room. Now, it's slowly coming together and gaining that peaceful feel I desired. The best part of this is my recent vision turned reality in just a weeks time!!
I always wanted a window seat as a kid. As I got older I still loved all those Pottery Barn pictures and HGTV projects of old homes with beautiful window seats that seemed so relaxing to just sit and read or write at. As it turns out, we have a cape cod style house and dormer windows in each bedroom. As my would have it, no window seats in any of the rooms! Enter my vision.
I didn't want to spend a lot of money and I also LOVE built in anything. Bookshelves, corner cabinets in the dining room... both of which this old house has. But mostly, those built in window seats with storage space under them. Just love them. In my hunt for a piece of furniture that would fit in our dormer I came across a picture on some website where they bought an old dresser at a thrift store and cut it, added a top and a few other things I didn't quite follow as far as construction goes but they made it sound so simple and they turned it into a window seat! PERFECT, I thought. We had a dresser in that area before buying our new furniture. I still had that dresser. And another for the extra wood we would need to fill in the frame. I told my husband my idea and he shook his head and said it wasn't possible.
Never tell a dreamer something isn't possible!! Especially when that dreamer's step dad will be in town in a few days and said step dad an build anything! I gave my mom a brief description of my idea and my step dad came with all sorts of saws and tools and his ability to see my vision.
The next day... it came to life! Best part is it's made out of our recycled dressers, just like I envisioned!
My childhood dream of a princess like window seat was all mine in just a handful of hours and $20 for the oak top we bought. Now that is definitely a perk of this old house! That's my reframe. My positive. My smile when my heart starts to race and the anxiety builds to an overflow point over the endless needs this home puts on us.
Anyway, I still plan to make a cushion to go on it. And because I put the drawers in for this pic I found paint under the handle was not dry and dripped down the nice smooth front of the top drawer. It's oil based paint and a pain to work with so eventually I'll need to fix that. But hey, in this old house.... it's ALWAYS something! At least I now have the soothing ambiance of my little cubby area where I can hide away and read or write during those precious free moments I get or during a bout of insomnia. Granted, since I love my bedroom now, I've been sleeping much better!
As always, if you look, you can always find the beauty in something. Or the joy, the hope, the smile. It takes work. For me anyway. But I keep trying, because life is too short to always be stressed and feeling blue. Often times, it's the simple things that I find bring me the most happiness. Funny how that works, huh?
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Namaste!
Jaci